When You’re Dealing With Grief And Heartache

Grief has come up a lot in the last few months.

For me, my friends and clients and when you’re dealing with grief and heartache it has the ability to allow you to clear many other hurts hidden in your being that you may not realise.

Grief can come from many things in life

  • Loss of a loved one
  • Loss of a dream
  • Giving up on a goal
  • Loss of self
  • Leaving family and friends when moving house
  • Loss of a pet

And when it comes down to it, it is simply something that you believe you will never get back.

The time you had with your loved one is now in the past.

Seeing your dream actualising and the enjoyment you would get from that is now gone and when your dreams are gone, who are you then? It’s almost as if you need to reinvent yourself and create new dreams to achieve. Which can feel false when you are grieving.

Even though losing someone through death or a relationship/friendship breakdown, even moving away (physically) from the people and areas you love and giving up on your dreams may seem like very different situations in life, the feelings of loss still activate a feeling of grief within.

So how do you cope with grief? How do you stop that gut wrenching feeling that stops you from getting out of bed in the morning?

You feel it!

Yes feel it!

Dive into that feeling. You know the one that makes you feel like you’re going to be ripped into tiny little pieces and you’ll never be able to put yourself together again.

The feeling that allows you to know that your whole world is falling apart and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.

Dive into it! FEEL IT!

The more you feel your grief the easier it will become. Click To Tweet

Grief cannot and will not hurt you. Grief is there for you to heal. It is there for you to connect with who you really are and the people or situation who have activated this grief are giving you an amazing gift.

It may not feel like it when you’re going through grief and your heart continually aches, yet the more you dive into the physical ache in your body, the more you bring it on and connect to where it is showing up in your life the more it will bring you into alignment with love.

*** A quick note – this process is very different from allowing your grief to take over your life where it then turns into depression or you have suicidal thoughts. If this occurs please either contact me or a trusted health care professional to support you.

I first learned this process when I was doing The Journey with Brandon Bays and both she and I had been taught by others to clear emotions by using techniques that would alleviate the pain, and those techniques work but they forget that grief is a gift. It’s not something to get rid of. Grief is something to feel and find out what is under it.

And underneath it all is love.

You know… You as a being do not have the ability to lose something, as we are all connected. Yet when we have our human experience it certainly doesn’t feel that way.

If you are reading this and the tears are streaming down your face because you are grieving for someone or something, just stop for a moment and breathe into that grief.

Imagine yourself diving into the middle of your grief, right down into the heart of it and let all the pain come to the surface.

It’s ok. You’re safe. Keep on feeling it until there is nothing more to feel.

And then what’s underneath that?

And underneath that?

And underneath that?

And if you dive right into the core of the pain that you felt, you’ll find that there is love. Pure love.

Once you feel that pure love it may just be an idea to imagine that love infusing through you and even allow it to spill over into what you are grieving about. Share it around.

As you do this process your grief has the ability to transform without suppressing it where it will only spring up at a later date.

You don’t have to forget how you felt about the person or situation, yet you may find that you have a different perspective.

If you would like to know more about how to do The Journey Process, here’s the link to Brandon Bay’s book where the process in in the back. And if you don’t have a friend to do it with you can record it and listen to yourself facilitating it for you… Easy!

In the meantime, don’t dismiss your feelings, LOVE THEM!

And if you need some help connecting with your beautiful feelings, book a consultation with me today.

Loving you… Loving life…

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Rosemary Davey

Rosemary Davey lives with her husband Scott and her fur babies in Western Australia. She has a background in Mind Body Medicine and Holistic Counselling and uses tools and techniques in her programs to enhance the relationships in your life.

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